Sep 29, 2008

The economy and my goals - scary LifeStuff!

I have to admit that I don't get to follow the news much, as whenever I have a child-free or husband-free moment, as well as no domesticated task to tend to, it is spent on working my transcription business and working on my patent and all the future tasks coming 'round the bend involving this new venture.

I had listened to a couple of friends and family members express how scared they were last week about the economy. Since I've felt a sense of fear for the future of my children since the big September 11, I didn't realize all this was going down. After the third person mentioned it, I decided to take a break and turn on the news. I can hardly tear myself away from it. I was unaware just how serious this was.

I'm worried. Not only am I worried about all of us because of what I'm watching and hearing, I'm worried about our livelihoods, my transcription business, and being able to move forward on my invention. Have I really waited almost 2 years from concept/prototype to being within weeks away from a final provisional patent application that I may not be able to move forward?

This brings with it many more questions dependent upon what I heard throughout the day...."Companies can't get loans to pay their employees." clients will pay their employees before me if that is the case (and understandably so).....What happens if my current clients are unable to pay me? What happens if I'm in turn unable to pay the girls depending on me to support their families?......"You may go to the bank for a withdrawal and nothing comes out."....Despite my money being in an FDIC bank, will I be able to take out a large lump sum in two months IF I'm able to even find a manufacturer willing to work with me in this economy? Might I lose out on the 12 months of my provisional protection coverage because I can't even get a professionally manufactured version made? Will I even be able to apply for the utility when the 12-month period expires? "It is wrong to call this a bailout deal, as it is actually an investment deal, and this is a good thing...." I'm so confused and tired of thinking in all these different directions.

For the first time, my carefully laid plan seems so weak, as does the future I have chosen for myself.

At the very least, no matter what goes down, my family and I will remain a family, and we will persevere, albeit possibly with a saddened or disappointed mommy and wife.

I'm lucky in that I know how to survive when the chips are down, thanks to my mother and grandmother. I come from a long line of women who have triumphed through some extremely trying times due to their strength, and I know I can weather any storm -- it is the storm that comes with strict rules, stipulations, and deadlines that is bothering me at the moment combined with the uncertainty as to whether or not I can meet them, especially knowing that I could have met them all last week. The unknown scares the heck out of me.

How 'bout you? What scares you most right now about this situation?

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